Posted by: Court | February 1, 2010

Answers, at least

After an awful weekend that I’d rather not discuss fully (RCIA retreat, I had a guy at my table who was being a nuisance), I was looking forward to hopefully getting my b/w results back. Well, they’re in, and…

hcg < 1. Awesome.

SO apparently that means I never ovulated, even though FAM/BBT would show that I did. I am so mad at my body for tricking me, for not being able to function normally. For letting myself fully believe that I was pregnant.

So now I guess I will have a prescription called in to Walg.reens to start AF. I take it for seven days, and then about seven days afterwards, AF will arrive. So two more weeks of this nonsense.

BUT

Pluses – I will be able to do the bloodwork, HSG, etc. and have a battle plan for ttc again. I won’t feel afraid of late ovulation and implantation, we’ll know if I have any clotting problems, etc. I will feel more in control of ttc, even if I wish it didn’t have to come to this.

—————-

It may go without saying that adoption has been put on the back burner for now. But I ordered a book about Christian adoption and know it will be a tremendous resource if/when we pick back up with that in the future.

—————-

I have decided to participate in a book study with my CRHP sisters. I know that it may be difficult to be around the pregnant women (almost definitely will be), but I need the spiritual rejuvenation. The book is Jesus’ Journey to the Cross, and it’s a book to read during Lent, which is quickly approaching!

I’m going by the Catholic store on my way home to see if they have it in stock. If so, I’ll take it with me to Adoration to read tonight. Then we’re off to B&K’s to see A before she falls asleep and watch 24!

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